Dear Son…

Dear son

 Making mistakes leads to discovery. So don’t give yourself a hard time. But, on the other hand, realise that today you made a decision that went against what you knew was both expected of you, and what was fair to those around you.

 You may wonder why I have not punished you. I know there are some parents around here who think it’s because I’m too soft so I thought I’d write this to you  in case you share this opinion. I know you hear ‘blah, blah, blah…’ when I talk; I was a teenager you know :).

 I have never raised you using punishment but I have used consequences. Wherever possible I have allowed natural consequences to teach you when you’ve chosen personal experience over my experience.

 And you and I know that today went seriously wrong for you.

 Fact is mate, make a bad decision and you start a bad ball-a-rollin. And the thing is, whatever you put out there in life you lose control of it once released and the ball will roll and build and gather others within it.

 Some call it ‘cause and effect’, some ‘what you sow you reap’ and some ‘karma’. Whatever we label it doesn’t matter hey because as you saw today it happens. If you can get this truth now you’ll be way ahead of a lot of adults.

 I don’t know about you my son but personally, I’d rather my actions didn’t cause anyone harm.

 Given this is the first time you’ve messed up…and given what turned out happening today I think you’ve been punished enough. But as this becomes a dim memory I want you to know that the only true mistake you can make in life is not to learn from your mistakes.

 So next time you go to make any decision ask yourself these following simple questions

 [1]     Is this decision going to impact others?

 Most do…that’s called living in community.

 [2]     Is that impact going to be a good impact?

 Remember treat others as you want to be treated. If what you’re about to do is going to cause grief for another then…

 [3]     Is there a way I can avoid that?

  There are always alternatives. You just need to slow on down and think, and communicate.

 I’m on your side remember.

 Love mum XXX

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